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It gives you a chance to walk away and take care of yourself instead of trying to fix it. In this first article April Motl says the following about emotional detachment in marriage: “A lot can happen between the ‘I do’ at the altar and the years that follow. Emotional detachment does not just happen out of the blue; there is always something behind it. Not physical walls, but relational walls that are expressed in body language, words and attitudes that help us feel safe. If things aren’t at the point where you feel love for your husband due to the problems in your marriage, then you treat him with kindness and courtesy. Being able to love unconditionally and openly is a sign of strength and not weakness. Attachment happens naturally and it does not take that time. Detachment, however, takes double time and is not as easy as falling for someone. An emotional affair is when a person not only invests more of their emotional energy outside their marriage but also receives emotional support and companionship from the new relationship. A marriage relationship cannot thrive if our contact with one another is limited to a quick bite of supper or a brief chat before bed. A good marriage requires weekly face-to-face time — both talk and fun. We’ve all had them – those epic battles with our spouse that leave us shattered and questioning why we’re still with them. Do not blame yourself for a relationship that failed because of a person was who unwillingly to invest more of himself in it. Detachment is a process of letting someone else be who they are while protecting yourself from their consequences. It's a lack of emotional support or feeling emotional intimacy with their partner. In an emotional affair, a person feels closer to the other party and may experience increasing sexual tension or chemistry. Detachment is not a task it is a process, and if you think it is an easy one, you are clearly mistaken. Detachment provides that emotional space between you and the annoying behavior. The Value of Detachment When a marriage is failing, detachment can be a lifesaver. We can end up married to someone yet emotionally, mentally, spiritually and physically disengaged. Emotional detachment means moving away from making decisions-getting into arguments, making large purchases, or reaching important conclusions-based entirely on emotion, rather than a healthy, effective approach rooted in the careful discourse, understanding, and acceptance. Detachment with love means taking responsibility for yourself while showing your husband love. It takes time and becomes even difficult when you are deeply involved with someone emotionally. Use a little emotional detachment to prevent fights with your honey from destroying you. When we feel emotionally threatened in our marriage, we can build walls, too. 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